Reclaiming ourselves: Letting go of the ghosts in our closets.

As I stared into the walk in wardrobe I realised it had become a graveyard, filled with all the identities i had shed but not let go of.

I used to love the idea of having a walk in wardrobe all my clothes lovingly on display. Instead..

It had become a room I dreaded to walk into, Overwhelming and underwhelming all in the same sentence.

I remember that sinking feeling of standing in the room, surrounded by clothes that felt like they belonged to someone else – a relic of a bygone era when my life looked vastly different. These garments, once chosen to conform to societal standards or fit into a particular role, now felt like costumes from a past life.

The realisation hit me: I had outgrown these clothes, both literally and metaphorically. I was no longer the person who wore them.

Remembering the late teen, fun, care free with no direction, The young 20 year old wearing that dress, when i kissed that boy, the older 20 something dressing for the male gaze, opening a shop, wearing 1950s corsets and stockings.

The 30 year old me that survived covid, suffered with depression and anxiety, to the point i didn’t want to get dressed - Gained so much weight i didn’t fit in anything and suffered so much loss i didn’t see the point in trying to look nice.

Now, Im nearly 34 and I feel I have broken out of the cocoon of expectations, No longer feeling the need to have everything - Including the walk in wardrobe.

Sometimes we tar fashion as superficial, surface level, materialistic and don’t get me wrong. It can be all those things.

However, fashion is so much more than just clothes.

It's a form of self-care, a way to honor ourselves and celebrate our identities.

By consciously choosing what we wear, we reclaim ownership of our bodies and our narratives. We assert ourselves in a world that often tries to dictate who we should be, Fashion helps us rebel - Fashion is a means of self-expression, a way to outwardly reflect our inner selves to the world. Yet, for many of us, our wardrobes can become cluttered with remnants of the past, leaving us feeling disconnected from who we are now, in this moment. Fashion can be such a powerful tool for transformation and empowerment.

Piece by piece, I am still creating a wardrobe that reflects the person I am becoming, fashion can grow with us, encourage us to change, allow ourselves to show and fully embrace who we becoming. we need to give ourselves permission to be fully in this new chapter and we change so much on the inside fashion allows us to evolve on the outside, too. Reclaiming our identity through fashion requires courage – the courage to let go of the familiar, to embrace change, and to trust in our instincts - or hire a fabulous stylist who just wants to see you shine. ( I happen to know one!)

It can spark joy and be an outlet for creativity, Everytime you get dressed in the morning it should be an experience you enjoy - it uses two of our biggest senses - sight and touch. Gone are the days of buying things because i think they’re cool - they need to be cool of course! but they need to be me. They need to be purposeful and survive years of wear. I try to pick classic pieces in natural fabrics and mix them with bold eclectic items that truly project my voice out into the world.

So, to anyone feeling lost in their own closet, I offer this advice: trust yourself. Listen to that inner voice urging you to let go of what no longer serves you.

Clothes will never define who you are as they are still just material things (Literally!) but they do speak a language and in our own voice we can help people see a glimpse of who we choose to be.

Grab a tea or a glass of wine - get your girlfriend over or a really honest mirror and just start, shed the weight of those ghosts.

It may not be easy, but the journey towards self-discovery is always worth it in the end..

*I offer services such as - Small wardrobe refreshes - Curated closet packages to a full overhaul.

Feel free to contact me to start your journey.